How To Even…Write About What You Did On Your Summer Vacation

By CL Bledsoe & Michael Gushue

Welcome to Part Two of How To Even’s Back-To-School special. Last week, in Part One, we showed those of you headed for college how to survive the bloody cage match that is living in a dorm. This week, we tackle one of education’s time honored rituals. Nope, not standardized testing. There is, unfortunately, no help to be given for that soul-killing scam-a-thon. The best bet is to numb your feelings as much as possible using meditation, drugs, or not having a soul. We’re talking about the time-honored tradition of Busy Work. We are here to help you with How To Even…Write About What You Did On Your Summer Vacation. Next week, we wrap up the series with a quiz on How To Even…Be Too Cool For School. Stay tuned.

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You’re back at school, wishing you were in bed. You’re thinking you wasted your summer — maybe not yet realizing this is just a precursor to how you’ll waste your entire life — but at least you don’t have to tell anyone about it. That’s when your teacher drops the fire bomb, i.e. a writing assignment, on the Dresden of your self-hatred: Write about what you did on your summer vacation. Shitze.

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