How to Even…Walk Your Dog

By Michael Gushue & CL Bledsoe

You got a dog because you thought, “Hey, I’ll take it for walks, and that’ll be a good way to get a little exercise and get outside. I’ll have a little friend! It’ll be nice!” You fool. You sad, deluded fool. Well, you got your wish. Now, you’ve got a dog that loves you unconditionally, the poor sap. What did it ever do to deserve getting stuck with you? And worse yet, all it wants in…