How To Even…Clean the Filthy Mess You Call a Home

By Michael Gushue and CL Bledsoe

Life is messy, and our homes can be even more so. There’s probably a correlation there, but we can’t find it under all these empty Hot Pocket boxes. If you live in filth long enough, it becomes decor. Or anthropological artifacts. But maybe you don’t have 50,000 years. Maybe there’s a herd of cats and possums outside your window at all times because your bedroom smells like sea garbage, and they look at you funny when you open the door to pee off your porch. We’re not judging. We’ll leave that to the cats. They’re better at it than we are.

But at a certain point, you’ve got to do something about it, or the city will do it for you. It can seem overwhelming, but luckily, we at How To Even…LLC have come up with some tips to help you clean that disgusting mess you call a home…and a life. Probably just the home, though. Let’s be realistic.

So, let’s break it down room by room, to start.

Living room

The living room is the main room visitors (haha like you get visitors) will see, so it’s important to keep it somewhat habitable. Also, your TV is probably in there, unless you have a den or read books or something, so there’s a comfort issue. And you need to be able to find your remote.